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Dichotomy of Love & Attraction: Unravelling Deeds and Desires
Spirituality India World

Dichotomy of Love & Attraction: Unravelling Deeds and Desires

Human emotions and relationships are complex webs of feelings, actions, and intentions. Among these intricacies, two prominent emotional states that often intertwine and confuse are love and attraction. These two concepts have profound impacts on our lives, shaping our interactions with family, friends, and partners. By delving into the essence of love and attraction and their underlying motivations, we can better understand the stark contrasts between the two.

Nature of Love

Love, a sublime and selfless emotion, is often rooted in compassion and empathy. When we love someone, our actions are guided by the desire to bring happiness and well-being to that individual. It’s an altruistic bond that revolves around giving without expecting anything in return. Love fosters an environment of mutual care and respect, where both parties feel valued and cherished.

Consider the relationship between parents and their children. In a loving relationship, parents wholeheartedly wish for their children’s happiness and pray for their well-being. Their intentions are noble, aiming to provide the best opportunities and support. It’s about nurturing the child’s growth and allowing them to flourish on their chosen paths.

Dynamics of Attraction

On the other hand, attraction often emerges from a different place within us. It can be driven by the desire to gain something from the other person—be it physical pleasure, material gain, or personal validation. Attraction can sometimes stem from arrogance, as it may involve seeking services or benefits without considering the other person’s feelings or well-being.

Attraction doesn’t always possess the same level of selflessness as love. It can lead to a more transactional relationship, where actions are motivated by personal gain rather than the happiness of the other person. This can be observed in scenarios where parents boast about providing everything for their children, emphasizing their role arrogantly in fulfilling their offspring’s needs.

Impact on Relationships

The differences between love and attraction have profound effects on the dynamics of relationships. Love tends to liberate individuals, allowing them to grow and flourish while maintaining their individuality. It’s a force that strengthens connections and creates a supportive environment. Love nurtures a sense of pride in one’s actions to promote the happiness and success of the loved ones.

Attraction, however, can be binding in nature. It may create dependencies that restrict personal growth and empowerment. Relationships rooted in attraction might lead to a desire to control or possess the other person, rather than allowing them the freedom to express themselves authentically. This possessiveness can hinder the growth of both parties involved.

Moral & Ethical Dimensions

Love and attraction also carry distinct moral and ethical connotations. Love aligns with principles of righteousness and virtue. It promotes a sense of duty and selflessness, encouraging individuals to put the well-being of others before their own desires. In many cultures and belief systems, love is seen as a manifestation of ‘Dharma’—the righteous path.

Attraction, by contrast, can sometimes veer into the realm of ‘Adharma’—actions that are considered unethical or morally wrong. When actions are driven solely by personal gain or arrogance, they might contradict ethical values that emphasize the importance of empathy, consideration, and selflessness.


In the intricate fabric of human emotions and relationships, the distinction between love and attraction plays a pivotal role. Love, born from compassion and guided by selflessness, fosters an environment of care, support, and mutual growth. Attraction, which can arise from desires and sometimes arrogance, tends to be more self-centered and may lead to dependencies and possessiveness.

Understanding the nuances of love and attraction enables us to navigate our relationships more consciously. By embracing the principles of love, we can cultivate healthier, more fulfilling connections with others. Recognizing the potential pitfalls of attraction helps us avoid falling into patterns of possessiveness and selfishness.

Ultimately, whether in our interactions with family, friends, or partner, the choices we make between these two emotional states can shape the course of our relationships and contribute to our own personal growth & fulfillment.


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